Well, I'm single.
That is what God has for me right now.
Or, He's waiting for me to take a step.
You see, I don't want to be single.
There is a guy I know.
And I like like him.
And not for who I want him to be, but for who I know him to be.
This is a big deal.
My dad was the first person to know.
And I told him when we arrived at our hotel after visiting the cemetery where many of my ancestors, including my grandfather, are buried.
(My parents got engaged after a visit to that same cemetery, so I thought it was a good time to tell him.)
I've been telling God about this all summer and, as far as I can tell, He hasn't given me any clear answers.
Last week's sermon included a point about taking steps in the direction of our prayers.
So I've been wondering about that this week, because I often want to sit this guy down and say "here's the deal. I like you. I don't care what you want to do with that, but you need to know."
I wonder if that's all it would take, if that would be the beginning of our "happily ever after."
Or if it would be the ending of what might turn out to be a silly crush.
I don't know and I'm confused and impatient.
Do I wait for him to pursue me?
Because that's how it's "supposed to be," the guy chasing the girl?
I won't do it for the sake of tradition.
I just don't know what to do, and it's leaving me feeling unsettled.
Before this summer, the single life had its ups and downs.
I'd be really happy being single, and then I'd be mad about it.
I'd get super jealous of those couples who'd flaunt their couple-ness.
I wanted date nights for the sake of having date nights.
And then I thought about how difficult it is to be in a relationship.
It's not always cute and cuddly. It's not supposed to be.
It's work, and sometimes the mere thought of having to work like that just wears me out.
Now I want a certain person to ask me out to dinner, or even to dance.
(See what I did there, Owl City fans?)
I've wanted a reason to dress to impress, not that he'd care.
(But I know he'd notice.)
So, I'm single.
I'm not super happy about it.
And my lips are sealed.
That is what God has for me right now.
Or, He's waiting for me to take a step.
You see, I don't want to be single.
There is a guy I know.
And I like like him.
And not for who I want him to be, but for who I know him to be.
This is a big deal.
My dad was the first person to know.
And I told him when we arrived at our hotel after visiting the cemetery where many of my ancestors, including my grandfather, are buried.
(My parents got engaged after a visit to that same cemetery, so I thought it was a good time to tell him.)
I've been telling God about this all summer and, as far as I can tell, He hasn't given me any clear answers.
Last week's sermon included a point about taking steps in the direction of our prayers.
So I've been wondering about that this week, because I often want to sit this guy down and say "here's the deal. I like you. I don't care what you want to do with that, but you need to know."
I wonder if that's all it would take, if that would be the beginning of our "happily ever after."
Or if it would be the ending of what might turn out to be a silly crush.
I don't know and I'm confused and impatient.
Do I wait for him to pursue me?
Because that's how it's "supposed to be," the guy chasing the girl?
I won't do it for the sake of tradition.
I just don't know what to do, and it's leaving me feeling unsettled.
Before this summer, the single life had its ups and downs.
I'd be really happy being single, and then I'd be mad about it.
I'd get super jealous of those couples who'd flaunt their couple-ness.
I wanted date nights for the sake of having date nights.
And then I thought about how difficult it is to be in a relationship.
It's not always cute and cuddly. It's not supposed to be.
It's work, and sometimes the mere thought of having to work like that just wears me out.
Now I want a certain person to ask me out to dinner, or even to dance.
(See what I did there, Owl City fans?)
I've wanted a reason to dress to impress, not that he'd care.
(But I know he'd notice.)
So, I'm single.
I'm not super happy about it.
And my lips are sealed.
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